Batshit Crazy & Medicated for your Protection

The boring life of Jerod Poore, Crazy Meds' Chief Citizen Medical Expert.

We Don’t Have a Monopoly on Bigotry




Apparently President Obama doesn’t know what it is like to be a member of an oppressed minority.  


Let’s change one word in what Mr. Obama said.

“We don’t have a monopoly on black people.”

Look at Nigeria, the Central African Republic, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo.  The black people there are killing each other by the hundreds, thousands, and millions over religious and ethnic differences.  In the United States the same thing is expressed as Bloods versus Crips and East Side versus West Side.  In the 1990s it was Tutsi versus Hutu in Rwanda and Burundi.  In the US it was Tupac versus Biggie Smalls.

The United States has the best justice system in the world.  Our juries are comprised of citizens vetted by qualified attorneys who attended first-class law schools, lawyers just like the President and the First Lady.  Our prisons are full of black people for a reason.  George Zimmerman was acquitted for killing Trayvon Martin because black people are as prone to violence as crazy people.

The solution to all the violence caused by black people is simple.  Put all their names, addresses, Social Security numbers, and anything else useful in tracking them in an FBI database, accessible to anyone so they can’t buy guns at gun shows.  Or get jobs.  Or rent apartments in my neighborhood.  Some people suggest we preemptively round up all the black people and put them in jail, or camps, or send them back to Africa, or just kill them.  That seems pretty extreme, but how much violent crime do they have in Sweden or Iceland?  White people haven’t gone to war with each other over ethnic differences since the 20th century.  Muslims don’t count, because they’re worse than the blacks.

I sure as hell am glad I never ran into a crazy black person like Wesley Willis.  He would have killed me with his keyboard.  I don’t know how he found the time to make so many records when he must have been killing more people around Chicago than all the drug dealers there.

Have I spewed enough hate for you, Mr. Obama?

I’m not in the least surprised you can’t associate the fear, hatred, violence, stigma and degradation directed at the mentally ill with the exact same thing directed at African Americans, Muslims, immigrants, homosexuals, Mormons, people receiving some form of government assistance, or anyone else not considered ‘real Americans’ by whoever defines themself as a ‘real American.’  Why?  Because the mentally interesting are less than human.  We’re the one group everyone can agree is lower than undocumented terrorists who have entered this country illegally to steal the jobs of domestic terrorists.

I don’t have a problem with being called “crazy.”  I self-identify as “batshit crazy.”  Politically correct “person first” bullshit isn’t going to make things better.  It’s not the terminology that hurts, it’s everything else.

Let’s examine things a little closer.

In referring to mass shootings, especially at schools, Mr. Obama also said, “We get a new one every week it seems.”

There have been 74 shootings at schools since Sandy Hook.  I could find instances of ten, count them, 10 people with either a history, or after-the-fact diagnosis, of a mental illness of some kind who were the shooters, attempted to harm people at a school, didn’t use a gun, or merely threatened violence at a school.   Incidents in the last two groups weren’t included in the 74 incidents that made it into whatever sources are used by the media outlets quoting that figure.  Doing really bad statistical analysis by including the people who didn’t use guns or didn’t do anything in the group of crazies who shot or shot at students, that means 13.5% of the most recent school shootings were committed, or potentially committed, by lunatics.  The generally accepted figure bandied about is one person in four will have some form of mental health issue in their life, so using even more bad statistics – just like politicians and most media outlets like to do - that’s not even meeting random chance probabilities.  We. Aren’t. The. Problem.

OK Mr. Obama, let’s replace “black” with “crazy,” and do a little editing, in part of what I wrote to show you how your bigotry will just make things worse for us.

The solution to all the violence caused by crazy people is simple.  Put all their names, addresses, Social Security numbers, and anything else useful in tracking them in an FBI database, accessible to anyone so they can’t buy guns at gun shows.  Or get jobs.  Or rent apartments in my neighborhood.  Some people suggest we preemptively round up all the crazy people and put them in jail, or camps, or just kill them.  That seems pretty extreme, but how much violent crime caused by crazies do they have in Germany?

You don’t think people have seriously suggested that we get rounded up and put away, or even systematically exterminated?  Think again.  Granted, preemptive imprisonment is a far more popular idea.

Jesus didn’t have a problem with us, and got pissed off at people who did.  Including his disciples.  Matthew 17:14-20.  That’s not a particularly obscure passage.  Give it a read, Mr. President, and rethink your bigotry.

Where’s NAMBLA NAMI?  How come they haven’t posted anything about what President Obama said?  Isn’t fighting bigotry and stigma supposed to be their job?  Oh, wait.  They’re totally into perpetuating the myth that mental illness = violence.  No, really.  Killing lots of people is just something crazy people do.  They just keep using the same press release, with a different town, shooter and body count.  They don’t expect any better of us.  We’re now nothing more to them than a reason for their existence as a professional fundraising organization.

Guess us crazies has to get all uppity about our civil rights by our own selfs.  Else we all gonna haf’ ta pass as not crazy by not goin’ to no doctors and takin’ no medicines that’ll git us in a big FBI list the whole wide world kin read.

Health Insurance Follies

I've needed to see a doctor for over a year.  Maybe even two.  I've got all sorts of symptoms that can't be written off as age, side effects, and/or depression.  I have health insurance, and I'm finally getting my act together to choose a PCP and make an appointment to see him.

Of course it can never be that easy.

First is choosing a doctor.  My insurance provider's website is one of the most user-hostile sites I've come across in some time.  My premiums hadn't been paid for three months because I thought all I needed to do to get the bills paid automagically was to sign up for it and enter all the information they need to pay the bill.  Turns out there's another page you need to go to in order to activate the fucking thing after all that.  And the first letter they sent me asking for the cash didn't arrive until two weeks after the second, which wasn't their fault, that's just how the mail is around here.  I'm glad they didn't cancel my policy.  

Trying to find a doctor through their site is painfully ... I don't know what the fuck they were trying to accomplish.  You can enter only one. parameter. at. a. time. regarding where you live, how far you're willing to drive, what sort of doctor you want to find, and what sort of coverage you have.  I can understand if they coded it that way in an attempt to speed things up, but the only thing it sped up that I can think of is how fast the code monkeys delivered it, because that's just lazy-ass coding.  Worst of all is the selection based on your coverage.  I can't remember what type of coverage I selected.  Can I look that up anywhere?  No.  It tells me where on the Olympic podium my plan is, but it doesn't tell me which network option I chose.  It's not on my card either.  As far as picking a local PCP is concerned, it didn't make any difference, but when it came to finding a shrink, therapist, and neurologist, I may as well just ignore their site and pick doctors based on whatever other info I can find.  Most of the shrinks they have are at the clinic where I went when I first moved to Missoula.  The clinic that was one of the reasons why I moved up here.  The clinic where every shrink I saw there retired on me and the EEG registered inconclusive when I was having a fucking aura during the test.  And the info they provide when comparing doctors is content-free.

Looking through the website of the regional health center to find a doctor was enlightening.  Two osteopaths (no thanks), three MDs, and five PAs.  Normally I would have gone with one of the PAs, but I think I need stronger medicine.  So of the three docs: 

One's an ENT.  Other than frequent nosebleeds, which are probably a side effect of fish oil as I used to get them all the time when I was a kid, and the occasional bout of tinnitus, those parts of me are OK.

One is ex-Navy who looks like he could play the part of a Navy doctor in a movie set on a ship during WWII.  He specializes in sticking things inside you and, based upon the results, cutting out stuff that's between your ribcage and thighs.  Ex-military I'm OK with.  I think I'd have a hard time convincing him I'd rather live with frequent minor kidney stones than seizures, or this fucking jamais vu I'm currently experiencing.

The third one is the Chief of Staff who specializes in family medicine and sports medicine.

The PAs are looking better and better.

I go with the Chief of Staff because he's also close to being a diagnostician, and that's what I really need.

So that's all set up.  The insurance company's website is happy I selected a PCP.  But it wants to know why I changed PCPs, and I can't update my policy without telling it something.  Selecting one because you enrolled in a new policy isn't an option.  Previous doc chosen in error is.

But can I make an appointment online?  Through either site?

Of course not.

I still have to deal with the phone.

I've been needing to make all sorts of fucking phone calls for three fucking weeks now.

On top of all that they limit prescriptions to 100 pills per fill.  That's 17 days of protriptyline, 20 days of 25mg topiramate and 25 days of buspirone.  My drug regimen is difficult enough as it is.  Not being able to get all my refills at once just makes my life that much more of a pain in the ass. 

I really need somebody to manage my life for me.
 

Alternative Geography

Courtesy of Bored Panda

40 Maps They Didn’t Teach You In School

There are a few selections from Yanko Tsvetkov / Alphadesigner. I especially like this one, showing the consolidation of social networks:


More Gorgeous & Hilarious Maps from Yanko Tsvetkov AKA ArtWerk, Alphadesigner

Five years back in The Map is the Territory I posted a map made by Yanko Tsvetkov.  Turns out he has a huge collection of these gorgeous, pointed, and hilarious maps in his Mapping Stereotypes project, many of which have been collected as Atlas of Prejudice Volume 1 and Volume 2. One example of the awesomeness:


Is the Stigma *THAT* Bad?

I seem to be the only person on the planet selling Schizophrenia Sucks!, Fuck Schizophrenia, and Team Schizophrenia merchandise of any kind. I could possibly trademark the terms for use on crap like shirts & mugs. A concept that is crazier than I am.  Is the stigma against schizophrenia that fucking bad these days?

But why not be that fucking mercenary? I've got so many Amazon ads on Crazymeds I already feel like Jean Genet on the Marseille waterfront.  I'd still sell Team Schizophrenia stuff at cost, like I do now.  

I have a vague memory about getting a trademark on something, then making it available for use by the public, just to prevent someone from getting a trademark so no one else could use it.  If that is real and not a figment of my increasingly-unreliable memory, I'd do that for Team Schizophrenia.  As much as I dislike awarenessitis, apparently most people do need to be bitchslapped into the awareness that the mentally interesting, especially the schizophrenic, are not significantly more violent than everyone else.  So I wouldn't want any local organization doing a little fund- or awareness-raising to be prevented from creating Team Schizophrenia shirts if someone else wanted to corner the non-existent market of schizophrenia-related merchandise.

Updated: Crazymeds Is no longer Down

And now we're back up.  Yay!  I <3 lunarpages.




The entire Crazymeds site is currently down.  The problem appears to be at LunarPages, as their website is too swamped to let me open up a support ticket and the support lines, both toll-free and the real number behind it, are busy.  I can't even bring up nameserver info for Crazymeds, so something is hosed bigtime. 

Free at Last?

Day Whatever +1

No longer snowed in.  

By 17:30 yesterday a day's worth of rain and a temperature above 40°F melted enough of the snow around the truck to get me down there with a snow shovel and a few buckets of very hot water.  I managed to extract the truck and drive it down to the berm that's alongside the road.  That fucker is still about two feet high.  I collected the newspapers that had piled up, what mail made it into the box before it wasn't accessible, the package fish oil, which was left behind the mailbox.  Had I made it down there sooner I probably wouldn't have noticed it, as the plastic bag it was wrapped in was just peeking above the snow.  The website of the place I bought it from was less than helpful, as it shows the order as yet to be shipped in the first place.

Able to take out garbage.  Hoarding was a lot better before TV made it cool.

Today I broke through the berm.  It took several attempts, but the truck eventually made it through/over.  I picked up the mail and got some food.  The postmaster was surprised to see me, given how buried my mailbox is and how much snow was piled up in the driveway.

I-90 is open again.  I'll get my meds tomorrow.  I called in my refills and it sounded extremely chaotic at the pharmacy.  With the interstate closed for a day and a half and that being the only pharmacy serving half the county, I'm not surprised.  One more night on short rations for topiramate.

At Least I'm Not Alone

Day Whatever

I-90 is closed in both directions from the Idaho border to Tarkio due to intermittent avalanches.  There's black ice, heavy slush and assorted other road hazards associated with lot's of snow alternating with rain and relatively warm temperatures the rest of the way.  Tarkio is about half-way from Saint Regis to Missoula, and the name of the alt-country band Colin Meloy was in before The Decemberists.

Even if I were able to get my pickup to the road I'm not sure if I could make it to Superior via back roads in order to get meds.  The snow may melt enough for me to extract the truck and get to Saint Regis and pick up some groceries.

I'm just getting too caught up in what I'm doing to worry about crap like that.

Stir Crazier

Day 6 or 7

In answer to a couple of suggestions.

Delivery anything is not an option, I've got stuff waiting for me at the post office, but I don't know how long they'll keep it.  Just as I cannot get out, no one can get in.  There is now about two feet of snow piled up along a 700-foot looped driveway.  Plus there's a berm near the road - created when the snowplow clearing the road goes by - that may be even higher.  The guy who used to plow snow for me, who had a nice, big Kubota tractor, dropped off the grid and I'm incapable of finding someone else to do it.
Having more supplies wouldn't be the same.  That scenario would be just like any other time I go two weeks without leaving the house, not seeing or talking with anyone, and not dealing with the Internet.  This is very different.  As my truck and trash bin vanish beneath the snow and I'm forced to eat food even less appealing than what I've been living off of during my 18-year-long permanent Lent with its ever-increasing list of denial; and there are full trash bags next to the kitchen garbage can as if I've graduate from pack-rat to hoarder; and the cats are going stir crazy because there is too much snow even for them; I'm now inspired to work on things like the books no one will read, one of which I've been writing on and off for 20 years.  These things, and others like them, have always been pushed aside because my life has gotten in the way.  Now that I've reached the point of really not caring I can work on them, along with, and not instead of, Crazymeds, which is no longer making enough money to support itself, let alone me.

Creative types know the drill: those bitch muses with their perfect timing of getting your juices all hot and bothered right before someone in your life needs (or is just especially insistent upon) you for something that is, or seems to them, to be extremely important.  Or your life makes demands of you along the lines of doing something that pays the rent or seeking medical attention.  Which choice do you make?  Pablo Picasso probably was called an asshole by numerous people, especially the women in his life.  The list of artists who suffered for their work is endless, and most of them not only died young and broke but remain anonymous to this day.

Knowing the likely outcome and not caring is very liberating.



Cabin Fever

Day 5, or maybe 6 of being snowed in.  While 12 inches of snow hasn't been a problem for my pickup, 16 inches was.  It's been sitting in a snowbank for the last however many days and I think I've managed to fuck-up the transmission.  After much digging and applying cat litter only the passenger-side front wheel and driver-side rear wheel were doing anything.  Running low on meds.  Been out of milk since Thursday?  Really feeling the lack of fish oil.  The idea of dealing with people is repugnant.

On the plus side, I'm getting a shitload of work done.  I should do this more often.

Plumbing Mystery Resolved

Mystery solved.  Thanks to a burst pipe.  In a wall.  Along the only pipe in the Monty Pythonesque plumbing that can't be isolated from the water pump.  So no running water, and the downstairs apartment is flooded.  I expect a nice crop of Peziza domiciliana any day now.

Fortunately I have 5 - 7 days of drinking water stashed away.  And plenty of snow.  It's not the heavy wet stuff, so bringing it to melt will be a pain, but at least I have something to wash with until I can find someone willing to come out here to fix the plumbing.  But I need to deal with the insurance first.  When they open on Monday.  

No matter what, I need to take care of this before all the snow is gone.  With any luck it will keep snowing and I can put this off indefinitely.

I'm so fucking chill...

What's the difference between yesterday (top) and today?


Yesterday I had hot water.

I'm close to my limit.  Really.  Fucking.  Close.  Crazy Meds isn't making enough money to support itself and now this. 

I'm pretty sure the water heater itself is working, and something is preventing the water in it from getting anywhere.  There's a leak somewhere, or the pressure tank is about to die, or something.  My guess is a leak, because the pressure tank kicks on once or twice an hour for no good reason.  And a leak would be the most expensive thing to fix.

I'm not even able to care all that much at the moment.  Right now I want to sell this dump to whatever "we buy houses for cash" douchebags will give me the most cash, sell Crazy Meds, clean out my IRA, buy a shack somewhere, and just drop off the grid.

meta update


  • I've moved more blogs back from the short-lived personal blog at another address.  There's still some more crap I want to bring back here, but it'll keep.
  • I've also moved a lot of stuff to the defunct blog roll, and deleted a bunch that have nothing to do with what they used to be (and of little interest) or are nothing more than parked domains.  I hope to look for more interesting blogs and sites.
  • I want to use the name Crazy Meds: The Blog for the real Crazy Meds blog's Feedburner feed.  That happens to be the name of the feed for this blog.  So if the three of you who are subscribed to this via Feedburner could please resubscribe via the form way the fuck down at the bottom of the page so I can delete the existing feed I'd appreciate it.
  • The essay on criminalizing mental illness as a misguided method of protection against violence is now available on OpEd News.

Forum's back up.

We're back on the air.  Yay.

Forum down for emergency software upgrade.

We're off the air until I upgrade the software.  Sorry.

Crazy Meds: The Blog

In a desperate attempt to SEO the fuck out of Crazy Meds

Because I can’t deal with my life and need to do something that appears to be productive

Crazy Meds has needed an actual blog for some time.  A place for announcements, news items, and some short-attention-span tidbits from here or elsewhere.  So now it has one.

This blog will continue to exist, but it will now be more narcissistic personal and procrastination bait. I’ll still post notices of impending software upgrades or anything else that will cause a significant interruption of service there, and anything where an off-site location for posting is required because the entire domain is down.  As well as the occasional site update of note.  All the links to research, medical, and assorted pharma-related blogs and sites have been moved to the new blog.

Posts to the G+ page and Facebook page will continue as they always have.  While anyone can, in theory, read public posts to the G+ page without having a G+ account, who does?  Not that anyone reads the blogspot blog all that much either.

Rxmas Consumerist Orgy of New Products at Straitjacket T-Shirts

I've been putting up a shitload of new products at Straitjacket T-Shirts.  Just the thing for anyone who responds well to retail therapy, with or without Havidol (avafynetime); including those who respond to online window-shopping.  

Most of the new merchandise is in the Pile of Pills motif, featuring buttons and cheap jewelry, and some ridiculous, and ridiculously expensive, household items, such as curtains and a tablecloth.  Those last two are among several items that, while actually for sale, are mainly for entertainment purposes. 

There are also more clocks, with both the pill design and the Medication Time design, some of which are reasonably priced.

By popular demand there are now buttons and magnets.  Currently only the most popular designs are available in those media.  I'll see how well these do before even thinking about adding any more designs, as buttons are a pain in the ass to do in the Pill Font.  As I was adding the buttons to the store I saw the designs fit three magnets, so I threw those in for the hell of it.

I hope to add some new designs in time for Rxmas.


Begging for Attention

The beg button is back on the wiki.  There will soon be an obnoxious expansion of links to the CafePress store.  As I'm one of the lucky people who actually responds well to BuSpar I'll be looking into some form of advertising that isn't subject to ad-blocking software.  Such as those supremely annoying keyword links.

Lots & Lots of New Merchandise at Straitjacket T-Shirts

I've put up a shitload of new designs on shirts, mugs, stickers, and assorted other media at the expanded Straitjacket T-Shirts.  I had to make some slight changes to the mug designs to get them to look nearly as good as what they can do at Zazzle.  When I compare mugs from each of them side-by-side the difference is probably something that maybe 5% of people would notice.

When it comes to media the only thing Zazzle does that is massively superior to Cafe Press is jigsaw puzzles.  Cafe Press' puzzles are a miserable 30 pieces, while Zazzle's puzzles are a respectable 252 pieces.  I'm not even bothering to add puzzles to the Cafe Press product line.  I don't know if it will be worth keeping the Zazzle store open just for puzzles, so check them out while they're still there.

I still have more to come, but as always I doubt if I'll finish when I need to.  What's up now is barely in time for RXmas. 
 

Straitjacket T-Shirts Consolidating at Cafe Press

Zazzle now officially sucks more than Cafe Press.  Which means I'll be shutting down the Zazzle store.  And since I have to recreate what I want to sell on Cafe Press, I'm getting rid of designs that aren't selling.  Including shirts.  So if you want any of the really crappy designs, get them soon.

I've been updating existing designs of shirts and mugs with new versions of the Pill font, as well as creating new designs.  I suggest you don't buy any of the shirts that haven't been updated (Brain Cooties Aren't Contagious e.g.), unless you like the original Pill Font more than the new ones.

By popular request I've finally created more bumperstickers and other items like mouse pads.  I plan on converting some discontinued shirt designs into one or more of bumperstickers, mouse pads, mugs and maybe some of whatever other cheap crap Cafe Press offers that looks interesting.

New designs include things like:

United States of Pharmaceuticals sticker Medication Time Mug
United States of Pharmaceuticals sticker Medication Time Mug



So stop by the latest version of Straitjacket T-Shirts

The way traffic to and revenue from Crazy Meds is plummeting who knows how long I'll be around with this garbage.

New Feature on Crazy Meds: Rating Meds

You can now rate medications on #crazymeds. Most of them anyway, as I roll this out. A single, overall zero-to-five rating on a scale of #sucksdonkeydong to live-saving is far more cathartic than useful. It's really an experiment. If it works I'll try to get multiple 0-to-10 scales for efficacy, side effects, etc. So rate away on:

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Celexa

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Depakote

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Effexor

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Elavil

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Gabitril

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Lithium

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Luvox

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Neurontin

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Pamelor

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Pristiq

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Prozac

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Remeron

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Stavzor

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Strattera

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Symbyax

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Tegretol

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Thorazine

http://www.crazymeds.us/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Meds/Trileptal

... and probably some that I've missed.